As part of my 2010 resolution to start exercising more, I am starting a Fight Club and wanted to invite the 5 following Douche Bags to join:
#1. Spencer Pratt – Talk about the best #1 pick for any club. He’s the type of douche you can build your franchise around. I’m not sure which Spencer I hate more, the Hills douche or the new spiritually reborn douche. Either way, I would love to punch his stupid face in.
2. Jay Leno – I can’t stand Jay Leno and it has nothing to do with Conan. This is an old grudge as he is simply an annoying douche. I hate his face, his fake cackle, annoying interviewing style and the way he shakes people’s hands at the beginning of the show. I would love to box his ears shut and attempt to break his chin with a MMA kick.
3. Perez Hilton – I can’t belive this fat piece of shit is still floating around in 2010. I thought he’d be done 3 years ago – fingers crossed that this is minute 15. I would punch him in his fat stomach and take his luch money (which is probably a healthy sum).
4. John Mayer – Who the fuck is this guy? He went from the “body is a wonderland” teen jerk-off to burying his boner his some of the hottest arse out there. Truth be told, I’m inviting him to the group to smell his fingers and try to catch sloppy seconds.