An Exclusive Interview With Jason Reitman’s Penis

The DBJ: Up In the Air is getting rave reviews – how has this impacted your day to day life?

Jason Reitman’s Penis:
It’s been crazy man – I think they named the movie after me as I have been “Up in the Air” 24×7 I’m kidding but seriously folks it has been a great ride and well deserved.

Jason Reitman’s Ass: I don’t know mean to butt in (get it) but since the movie has come out, I cannot get stop getting kissed – there has been lots of smoke being blown at me.

The DBJ: Has the fame changed you?

Jason Reitman’s Penis: If you ever get to meet Jason do me a favor and shake his hand then smell your fingers – that’s not a filet of fish ok – I’m dripping in it – nothing but hot chicks where as before I was only getting some artsy sluts – let’s put it this way, I haven’t seen Jason’s hand in weeks and hope I never do again.

Jason Reitman’s Ass: Well success doesn’t stink – sorry all I know is toilet humor. I will say that I’ve noticed that Jason has been eating better which is good news for me.

The DBJ: What are you doing for the holidays?

Jason Reitman’s Penis: Clooney has some wild sex party lined up for us so I guess I’ll be working

Jason Reitman’s Ass: Heard a rumor about a sex party with Clooney so I may be called into active duty.

The DBJ: Anything special on your list to Santa this year

Jason Reitman’s Penis: Well, we’re Jewish but if I did believe in that shit, I would ask him for an Oscar, Golden Globe or anything that will keep this premium puntang around

Jason Reitman’s Ass: Something that would prevent me from farting

The DBJ: Any words of wisdom for the penises and asses of young filmmakers out there?

Jason Reitman’s Penis: Stay Horny
Jason Reitman’s Ass: Eat Shit


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