Why a Vegetarian Cookie Monster is The New Normal

A Rant from Donnie Bagley


1. Can the world go back to spinning on its correct axis?

2. Can someone please turn things back to normal?

3.When did this all happen? How did it all happen at once?

4.How did the economy collapse……this bad?

5.How does Wall St. “crash” then “select” companies STILL get HUGE chunks of cash?

6.Why are the wars are still going on?

7.What is Lady Gaga and why is this thing popular?

8. How did the “News” become a bunch of asshole’s opinion?
People….listen to the words….IT’S THEIR OPINION……NOT FACT!!!!!

9. When did it become okay to “code” every single fucking thing in the world?
Did it really start with the New Kids on the Block? (NKOTB) ???? Now we have NSF (Not Safe for Work) GMA (Good Morning America….and by the way, really?) DWTS (Dancing with the Stars) LOL and all of its counterparts, etc.. The list goes on and on and on and on! JUST FUCKING WRITE THE WORDS OUT!!!!!!

10. Why are humans so stupid?
The new thing is a utter lack of patience. I mean zero patience. The new trend is that if something lasts for more than 6 months people change their mind. Healthcare? Yes, reform and change it !!!!!……oh wait, it’s taking longer than 6 months to change it? Its on the news all the time? Oh well, I am sick of it now. DONT CHANGE IT! OBAMA IS EVIL!

Now people are also disbelieving in Global Warming? Apparently this is now is a “hoax” because the movie “The Day After Tomorrow” hasn’t happened yet and people are sick of the name. “Hey it’s snowing out, that global warming shit is a crock.” “Yeah, doesn’t seem to be gettin any warmer to me!” ….fucking retards. How bout we just call it the “Hey you stupid assholes, pollute less…like, a lot less, so that out children still have an “outdoors” initiative.” Would people understand then?

11. How did it get this bad? Do you know that the Cookie Monster on Sesame Street is now a fucking vegetarian? Did you know that? I am not lying. Cookies are now only “sometimes food.” Yeah, watch this shit with your kids or when your really stoned one day. Its FUCKING RIDICULOUS!!!!! He’s the fucking COOKIE MONSTER!!!!!!!! Now they got the poor bastard eating veggies and tofu and shit. Seriously how and when did we get HERE?

12.Sarah Palin. I think that is all I have to type.

Can someone please turn the regular channel back on? Just go back to some form of sanity! PLEASE!


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