10 Reasons Why I would Not Fuck Patti Stanger

Patti Stanger in 10 Years

If you don’t know who Patty Stanger is then I like you a lot. She is dumb gypsy whore who claims to be a professional matchmaker (translation: carny). She has a show on Bravo called Millionaire Matchmaker

Here are my 10 Reasons Why I would Not Fuck her:
#10 – Legs – I know cottage cheese can be a healthy snack but not in the bedroom

#9 – Style – She’s Blossom meets Ugly Betty with a splash of Mrs. Garrett

#8 – Hair – If her top looks that ratty, I can only imagine how gross the downstairs is

#7 – Bossy – This is one of those works/not works things and her type of bossy makes me feel dead below the waist.

#6 – Psycho – I would bet a large sum of money that we could find an ex of hers who would say she is a stage 5 clinger

#5 – Voice – Can you say nails on the chalkboard?

#4 – Eyes – I piss my pants whenever there is a talking head shot as this dumb bitch has some blew eyes – one blew east, one blew west.

#3 – Smile – has there ever been a smile that screams phony as loud

#2 – Stomach – I’ll be nice as we all know what this looks like

#1 – Have you seen her & in HD?

4 thoughts on “10 Reasons Why I would Not Fuck Patti Stanger

  1. LOL. If she looks like Mrs. Garrett in 10 years, she should count herself lucky. I say the beyooch will look more like Margaret Hamilton, the Wicked Witch from the Wizard of Oz…

  2. Have u seen your eyes? Ha ha ha ha! It takes a real man to talk trash about a woman on the internet.make u feel good,loser. Not counting the fact she is more successful and wealthy than u could ever dream to be. Wimpy boy.

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